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Under Your Skin Page 19
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When he returned to Norah’s side, she said, “You’re treating me like a kid.”
“You’re drunk. Every guy in this place can see it. I’m not going to leave you here and hope you’ll be okay.”
She ran a hand down his chest. “So stay with me.”
“Can’t. Jaleesa already left my house.”
Norah leaned forward and rested her forehead on his chest. “I don’t want to go home.”
He tilted her chin up. “Why not?”
She looked around his shoulder to where Tommy was sitting. “Let’s go outside.”
Grabbing his hand and interlocking her fingers with his, she led him out the front door. She kept walking until she turned the corner of the building, out of sight of the windows and door and away from the noise of traffic. But then she didn’t say anything. She stood there holding his hand.
“Speak.”
“I’m not a dog any more than I’m a kid.” Her chin lifted, ready for a fight, but it wasn’t in her eyes.
“What’s wrong?”
“I don’t want to be alone, Kai. Is that so terrible?”
He knew the feeling. Keep busy, keep other people around to stave off the loneliness, but no one was close enough to see it.
“Sometimes, I feel so empty. I have nothing. No school, no job. Shit. I don’t even have friends.” She offered a weak smile. “Present company excluded, of course.” She released a sigh that caused her shoulders to sag. “I only had one thing that was mine and she was perfect and I gave her away.”
Kai remembered Tommy asking him how she was doing, whether she’d been faking being okay. Kai wondered if she’d talked to anyone or if she’d kept it all in.
Norah stared across the street, tears pooling in her eyes. Did she regret giving her baby up? Kai didn’t know what to say.
She inhaled, her breath hitching. Keeping her gaze on something far away, she continued, “I know it was the right choice, the best thing for Ella, but some days, it’s like a crater in the middle of my chest. I’m not ready to be alone tonight, and I’m always alone at home.”
Turning to face him, she said, “The loneliness gets to me. Ever since I was twelve and Jimmy sent me to live with my aunt in Boston and I was always alone.”
His own chest filled with some awkward emotion because she’d shared this with him. He still didn’t have any words for her, so he pulled her close and held her. He waited for the tears to come, but they didn’t. She just wrapped her arms around his waist and laid her cheek against him.
“What can I do?” The question was every bit for himself as it was for her. He didn’t know how to be in a relationship with someone like her. He liked his women simple, and Norah was everything but.
“Don’t leave me.”
Fuck. A simple request. He knew she meant for now because she was feeling low and lonely, but part of him couldn’t help but feel like it was more.
Chapter Twelve
She shouldn’t have said it. She was drunk and like always, alcohol made her talk too much. But Kai made it easy because he never talked. He just listened.
And he held her. God, she loved the way he held her. Like she was an expensive treasure, delicate but not fragile. She tipped her head up and nuzzled his neck. His skin was warm and when she followed with her lips, he growled. She stepped closer, pushing him against the brick behind him.
His fingers flexed on her hips as her tongue trailed up to his ear. His hard-on pressed into her belly, at least as much as she could feel through the layers of cotton and elastic, which was a horrible reminder that she couldn’t take this too far. Her body wasn’t ready.
Oh, yes I am, it argued.
With his hands firmly at her hips, Kai pushed her away. “Stop.”
She tried not to be hurt that he pushed her away. She knew he was attracted to her.
“You don’t have to use your body in order to not be alone.”
“What?”
His hand came up and cradled her jaw. “Not like this. I won’t do this because you’re sad and lonely.”
She snorted and tried to pull from his grasp. His fingers moved to the back of her head, forcing her to keep her eyes on him. She wanted to laugh him off, like he was so off base, but he saw right through her, which was a bitch.
Staring into his dark eyes, she readied for a lecture. Instead, he lowered his mouth to hers and offered her the sweetest kiss she’d ever received. His fingertips massaged her scalp while his other hand pulled her close again. His tongue caressed hers. It was a slow, patient kiss and she wanted to know what was behind it, what it meant, but her brain filled with fog.
She felt like she was floating and she would’ve given anything to stay there indefinitely. But it was too good to last. Kai pulled away again, sliding his hand from her hair, down her arm to her hand. Holding it, he said, “I promised you food. Where do you want to go?”
“Everyone knows tacos are the best drunk food.”
Kai drove them to a twenty-four-hour Mexican fast-food joint.
“Can I ask another favor?” she asked.
He glanced at her from the corner of his eye and waited.
“Can we get food to go? You need to check on your mom. We can eat at your house.”
Now he turned to face her. “What’s your game?”
“No game.” Damn. Like he couldn’t trust her to not throw herself at him. She picked at the hem of her skirt and swallowed hard. Might as well go for it. She’d already embarrassed herself plenty. “I can’t eat wearing this.”
“Huh?”
“Spanx.”
“Are you so drunk you’re not speaking English?”
She took a deep breath and let the words rush out. “I look so good in this outfit because I have spandex holding everything in. I can’t eat or I might explode.”
He laughed. Like an out-loud, deep rumbly, oh-my-God-strip-me-naked laugh. It vibrated through the car and across every cell of her body. Suddenly being embarrassed wasn’t so bad if she got to hear that. She tried to look indignant instead of turned on, so she raised her eyebrows and pointed at the restaurant. When his laugh subsided to a chuckle, he opened the door and stepped out of the car. “You coming?”
She crossed her arms. “I’ll wait here.”
He smiled and shook his head as he walked toward the restaurant. If she wasn’t mistaken, his shoulders were still shaking a little as he stood in line to get food. She wanted to be offended because who liked to be laughed at? But the sound of Kai’s laughter did something to her insides that had nothing to do with the alcohol sloshing around. It wasn’t even just a lustful thing. Whatever it was, it made her want to smile.
A few minutes later he came back to the car and handed her a bag as he slid behind the wheel. “I shouldn’t have laughed. Sorry.”
She knew she could use this to her advantage. But the smell of delicious food and the echo of his laugh in her head distracted her. “It’s okay. It is pretty ridiculous.”
“Why?”
“Why what?” The smell of the tacos called to her and she wondered how rude it would be to steal one and eat before they got to his house.
“Why would you squeeze into something that’s so uncomfortable you can’t eat?”
“To look good, of course.”
“You always look good.”
This time her snort was real. “I had a baby a few weeks ago. I’m fat and flabby. No guy wants to see that much jiggle on the dance floor or anywhere else.”
Kai shook his head. “Women,” he muttered.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“You call us dumb, but you haven’t figured out yet that we don’t give a fuck. The sexiest thing a woman can do is own her body and enjoy it.”
“Ha! That’s like telling a guy a sense of humor is the most important thing. Who are you kidding? Looks matter.”
“I’m not saying they don’t. But you obviously have a misconception about your body. You were fucking hot when you were nine month
s pregnant. And you knew it. I don’t get where the insecurity comes from now.”
He parked in front of his house and they got out. “It’s not so much insecurity as wanting to look good. And as long as I’m being totally honest and can deny everything tomorrow because I’m drunk, I wanted to get your attention and maybe make you a little jealous.”
“Why would you want to start that kind of shit?”
She thought of how to put it as he opened the front door. “I wanted a reaction. You’re always so stoic. Like nothing affects you.” He held the door open for her and she looked into his eyes. “I wanted to affect you.”
* * *
Norah had no idea how much she affected him. She walked by carrying the bag of food and he locked up. Before sitting to eat, he checked on his mom who was sound asleep. It seemed like the only time she was restless was when he needed her to leave him alone, like during his poker game. When he got back to the living room, the food was on the table, but Norah was nowhere in sight.
He went to the kitchen and grabbed some water for them. She was still missing. He knocked on the bathroom door. “Norah?”
“Uh, yeah?”
“You okay?”
“Yeah. Just changing.”
He went to the couch and opened the bag of food. A minute later, Norah walked into the room. She was barefoot and wearing her leggings but no skirt. And she wore his T-shirt that he’d left in the bathroom. “Feel better?”
“Lord, yes.” After she shoved her extra clothes in her purse, she rubbed her stomach. “I’m starving.”
He pointed at what she wore. “Is this stealing-my-clothes thing becoming a habit?”
She smirked, then plopped down next to him, too close for comfort.
“You want a clean shirt instead?”
Glancing down at the one she wore, like she was looking for dirt, she picked up the collar and sniffed. “Nope. This one smells like you.”
He decided not to mention that he liked the way she looked in his clothes. Instead, he handed her a couple of foil-wrapped steak tacos. She devoured them in record time.
She tossed her trash in the bag, handed him the TV remote, and settled back on the couch, leaning against him. He needed to drive her home, but then she settled and cuddled into his side.
He gently lifted her back and slid his arm around her, allowing her to snuggle closer. “I have to take you home.”
“I know. Let’s hang out for a while.” She turned her body a little and looked up at him. “We could watch TV or . . .”
“Or?”
Her sexy smirk was back. “Or we could make out.”
He thought about laughing, but realized she wasn’t joking. Not even a tease. She was serious.
She sat up a little more, pressing her palm on his thigh to do so, and licked her lips. “It’ll be like being fifteen again. Making out on the couch, hoping not to get caught.”
“At fifteen, I was sneaking girls into my bedroom and fucking half the night.”
“Half the night?”
“It would’ve been all night if they didn’t have to sneak home. Teenage boys have great stamina, but no experience. Such a waste.”
“Are you telling me you never made out with someone without expecting to go further?” Her hand still rested on his leg, her fingertips brushing the inside seam of his jeans.
“With my first girlfriend. We made out a few times before I talked her out of her clothes.”
“Then you missed out. There’s something to be said for the art of making out.” She shoved up and swung a leg over his to straddle him. “Getting all hot and bothered and just enjoying the moment makes you look forward to the next time.”
He shifted and grabbed her ass, pulling her flush against him. “Getting hard and ignoring it leads to blue balls, which isn’t something you look forward to.”
“Trust me.”
He let her take the lead and they made out on his couch, occasionally coming up for air, shifting positions so he could be on top. They groped and grabbed, licked and sucked, and damn if it didn’t feel good. His body screamed for him to tear Norah’s clothes off, but he wasn’t an impatient teenager anymore.
He didn’t know how long they made out, but Kai was stretched out on the couch and Norah lay on top of him. He played with her hair and wondered how he’d gotten to this point. He was nearly thirty years old and he’d just been talked into a make-out session.
Norah shifted and splayed her hand over his heart. “I wish I was still drunk enough to pass out.”
“Why?”
“Because if I passed out, you’d be stuck with me. You can’t carry me to the car and then into my house. You’d let me spend the night.”
“As good as sleeping next to an unconscious woman sounds, you’ll need your car tomorrow and I don’t want your brothers to kick my ass.”
She giggled. “My brothers are pretty tough, but I think you can take them.”
“My fighting days are over.” He knew she was joking and to a certain extent, so was he, but she needed to understand he was done living like that. He wouldn’t fight over a girl. He tapped her ass. “Get up so I can take you home before we both fall asleep.”
She rose and lifted the hem of the shirt she wore. “Want your shirt back?”
He grabbed her wrist. “Bring it back tomorrow.”
She slipped her feet into her boots. “You’re a party pooper.”
“Yeah, my partying days are over too. That’s what happens when you get old.”
“You’re not old.” She hung her purse on her shoulder and narrowed her eyes. “How old are you?”
“Thirty in December.”
“Oh my God. Time to get the walker. Wait, you can borrow your mom’s. She’ll be done with it by then.”
“Funny.” He tugged her hair and realized he enjoyed touching her any way he could. This didn’t bode well for him keeping things simple.
Norah was so quiet on the drive to her house he thought she’d fallen asleep, but when he parked, she sat straight and unbuckled. She twisted her body and leaned across the console. “Thank you for tonight. I know I wasn’t part of your plan.”
“You definitely weren’t, but I’m glad you pushed.”
“Pushy, huh? I can’t believe anyone would accuse me of that.”
He smiled and hauled her closer for a kiss good night. She was soft and gentle but so fucking hot. She moaned into his mouth and he wanted to spend the night finding all the ways to make her moan. He pulled back. “You need to go in.”
Stroking his jaw, she stared into his eyes. “All jokes aside, thank you.”
“I like your smiles and laughter a whole lot more than the tears, so it wasn’t much of a hardship.”
As she slid away from him, Kai realized everything with Norah had been effortless.
When she unlocked the front door, she turned and waved to him. A second realization hit: He was getting in way too deep.
* * *
Norah counted the days until her checkup with her doctor that would give her the go-ahead for having sex. She and Kai had been spending a lot of time together after he came home from work at night when they could be alone. During the day, when she came to take care of Lani, they chatted, but it was superficial stuff, as if he didn’t want his mom to know they had a thing going on.
That, of course, was part of the problem; they couldn’t quite define what they had going on. Because they hadn’t had sex, they weren’t fuck buddies. Yet they were definitely more than friends.
She got ready for work, finally able to button her pre-pregnancy jeans. All of the extra walks and sit-ups had done their job. Her midsection was still soft and flabby, but she felt good. Downstairs, she grabbed an apple to go. Just as she closed the fridge, the basement door opened.
“Hey,” Tommy called.
“Hey.”
“Going to work?”
“Yep.”
“How long are you going to keep working for Kai?”
She
shrugged. “Till his mom is better, I guess.”
“What about school?”
She patted the bag hanging on her shoulder. “I have my laptop and I’m talking to counselors this week about what credits will transfer so I can start next semester. What’s with all the questions?”
“Seems like you’re spending a lot of time over at Kai’s.”
“It’s quiet there. I don’t have to worry about running into any of the girls you and Sean bring home. And it’s easy money.”
“Yeah, but I know Kai left the shop early last night, but you didn’t get home until almost midnight.”
She crossed her arms. “What do you want to know, Tommy?”
“Are you sleeping with him?”
“Who I sleep with is none of your business, but since it’s only been a month since I had a baby, no.” So she was hedging the truth a little. She wasn’t embarrassed about wanting Kai, but it irritated her that Tommy would ask.
“But you want to.”
Not a question. She briefly wondered what kind of vibe she exuded that gave her away. “Does it matter?”
“He’s kind of old for you, don’t you think?”
She lifted a shoulder. “I never think about his age. I like him.”
Tommy sat on one of the kitchen chairs. “I hoped you’d be off guys for a while.”
Norah laughed. She couldn’t help it. “I was off guys for nine months. Have you ever gone that long without a girl?”
“Well, when you put it that way . . .”
“I thought so.”
“I don’t think he’s good for you, Norah.”
“He’s a good guy.”
“Questionable.”
“He’s a nice distraction from my life. We’re having fun. Neither of us is waltzing down the aisle.”
Tommy chuckled. “I’d be willing to pay to see Kai waltz anywhere.”
The image was pretty funny.
“You know I’m gonna tell Jimmy.”
“Why would you do that?”
“Besides the fact he might kill me if I didn’t?”
“I’m an adult. Does he check up on who you’re dating?”
“Now you’re dating? I thought he was a distraction.”