Hold Me Close Read online

  “Did you answer his questions honestly?”

  “Yeah.”

  He walked away from her but kept talking. “Then you couldn’t screw it up.”

  She followed until she realized he was going into his bedroom. Where he would drop the towel and be totally naked until he pulled on clothes. This was way harder than she’d thought it would be. “But if I knew, I could’ve prepared something.”

  “He’s a trained detective, Mags. I’m pretty sure he’d know if you were feeding him a line of bullshit.”

  His voice carried easily from the bedroom, where he hadn’t closed the door. If she angled her body a little, she could probably see everything. She sighed. She’d already seen it all. Felt it all. She closed her eyes and rubbed. Don’t go there.

  He came from the bedroom dressed in jeans and an O’Leary’s shirt. “Ready?”

  “Yeah.” She walked out the door and down to the bar.

  As they went in, he said, “We still need to have a conversation.”

  Before she could respond, Jenna came up and grabbed Shane’s arm. “Hey, there was a cop here—”

  “I know. I’m on the applicant’s list. They have to do a home visit.”

  “He wanted to know if you’re always in here drinking. I told him no, but he didn’t seem too thrilled. Then I explained you can’t drink on the job.” Jenna cringed.

  Shane pulled from her grasp. “Shit.”

  Maggie asked, “What?”

  “Cops can’t work in bars. Not at all. Not ever. I didn’t tell him I was working here.”

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t know.” Jenna’s face was full of remorse.

  “It’s okay.”

  Maggie bumped his arm. “See? If you had warned us, we’d know. We would’ve been able to help.”

  “It’s fine. It’ll either work out or it won’t.”

  He sure as fuck hoped it worked out. He’d thought he was okay. He wasn’t technically working here, but the only one who knew that was Ryan. And because of the holiday this weekend, he was supposed to work.

  Now he didn’t know what to do. “Is Ryan here?”

  “In back.”

  “I need to go talk to him. I’ll be right back.” He had no idea if Ryan could help or if he had any ideas, but if Carroll talked to him, Shane wanted to make sure Ryan told him that he absolutely did not work here. He knocked on the office door and waited for Ryan to call out.

  He stuck his head in the office and asked, “Got a minute?”

  “Sure. Come on in.”

  Shane walked to the center of the room and paused. He had no idea how to do this. Since he didn’t have any older siblings, the idea of asking for help was foreign. But he’d seen Maggie in action plenty over the years. “I have a small problem. At least I hope it’s small.”

  “What?”

  “I don’t know if Maggie mentioned it, but I applied to the police department, and although I’ve gone through a bunch of the steps, I’ve been on a waiting list.” Ryan didn’t comment, so he went on. “A detective came and did a home visit and wasn’t thrilled that I live above a bar. If that wasn’t bad enough, he came down here and talked to Jenna, who told him I work here.”

  “That’s a problem?”

  “Yeah. First, a cop can’t work at a bar. Which isn’t huge because I would just quit before starting the academy, but the bigger problem is that I didn’t tell him. I didn’t mention it because technically I don’t work here.”

  “And now you look like a liar.”

  Shane nodded. “I assume he hasn’t spoken to you?”

  “No. What do you want me to say if he does?”

  Shane shrugged. “I don’t know what the right answer is now.”

  Ryan stood behind his desk. “Call Jimmy, Moira’s fiancé. He’s a cop. He’ll know the best recourse.” He wrote on a scrap of paper and handed it to him. “Jimmy’s number.”

  “Thanks.”

  “You can still work this weekend, though, right?”

  Tension knotted his muscles. He wanted to be here for Maggie. What was the likelihood one more weekend would ruin his chances of being a cop? Shane forced a smiled. “Yeah. I’m heading out there now.”

  “I don’t need you tonight. Tomorrow and Saturday should be plenty. Maybe Sunday too.”

  Shane hitched a thumb over his shoulder. “Maggie’s working tonight.”

  “Okay.”

  Shane left the office and his muscles were still tense. Maggie was better and he probably didn’t need to work tonight. She’d been fine earlier in the week. She even texted him when she got into her apartment.

  But if he went back upstairs, he’d drive himself crazy thinking about Carroll and what he needed to say or do to get into the academy. Carroll had said Shane had to move. That meant leaving Maggie here.

  He pushed all the thoughts out of his head. There was nothing else he could do tonight. He walked through the crowd of the bar, watching for troublemakers and drunks, but it was too early for any of that. So for a while, he just watched Maggie work.

  She smiled as she served customers. Joked while she took orders. Laughed when another waitress leaned over to gossip in her ear.

  Although he didn’t necessarily enjoy the extra hours at the bar, he would miss seeing her every day.

  Maggie worked her shift with one eye on the clock the whole night. She’d planned for a late dinner break so she could spend time with Eli, since she wouldn’t be able to see him all weekend. As much as she’d been watching the clock, Shane had been watching her. He hadn’t accused her of dodging him, but that was only because she hadn’t given him the chance to say much of anything.

  She should probably tell him she had a guy coming to meet her. But she was a chicken. Something about what had transpired days ago picked at her. She didn’t want to hear Shane tell her she was stupid for wanting to date Eli. She wasn’t rushing into anything. They’d had dinner and talked. A lot. And now they’d have dinner again. It was normal, which was all she’d been looking for.

  The bar was busier than she had expected. A constant stream of customers filled her tables. By the time Eli walked in, her feet were crying for a break. She had no idea how she’d make it through the weekend.

  She saw Eli before he saw her. She waved him over. He greeted her with a kiss on her cheek.

  “This place is a madhouse.”

  “I know,” she said, pulling him toward a free table. “I had no idea we’d be this busy. I wasn’t expecting it to be like this until the weekend.”

  “If tonight’s not good for you—”

  “No. I’m due for a break. I can’t sit for long, but I’m glad you came.” Once he sat, she asked, “What do you want to drink?”

  “A beer.”

  “I’ll be right back.”

  She went to the bar, where Shane stood, still watching her. “Aren’t you supposed to be watching the crowd?”

  “I am. Who’s the guy?”

  Her skin warmed. “Eli. We met earlier this week. I asked him to stop by for dinner since I can’t see him this weekend.”

  Shane crossed his arms and the muscle in his jaw twitched. “We still need to talk.”

  “About?”

  “Us. This past weekend.”

  He was so serious. She didn’t like this side of Shane. “I don’t think there’s anything to talk about.”

  “Maggie.” His voice was soft, but she was able to hear him over the noise.

  The bartender slid Eli’s beer in front of Maggie. “I have to deliver this.”

  He laid a hand on her arm. “After we get off tonight, come to my apartment so we can talk.”

  The warmth of his firm grip reminded her of all the places his hands had been. She pulled away without answering. She didn’t want to have whatever conversation Shane seemed to think was necessary. She just wanted to go back to being what they always were.

  She delivered the beer to Eli. “Want something to eat? I think I can take my break now and hang out for a b
it.”

  “I ate earlier. I came just to see you.”

  She didn’t hide her smile. “I’m going to grab something. I’ll be right back.”

  As she put in her order for a basket of fries, she asked Kelly to cover her tables for a bit. Most of her customers were fine, but she didn’t want to take chances. Sharing a few tips when they were this busy wouldn’t break her.

  She grabbed her fries and a glass of water and went back to Eli’s table. While they snacked on fries, they talked and laughed. Even though she enjoyed herself, Maggie couldn’t stop thinking about Shane and what he wanted to talk about. What was there to say?

  When Maggie stood to get back to work, Eli asked, “What time do you get off?”

  “The bar closes at two. Then I have to help with cleanup.”

  “Can I call you later?”

  “Won’t you be in bed? You have to work in the morning, right?”

  “Yeah, but I like to talk to you.”

  “Okay,” she answered with a silly grin on her face.

  Eli left, and Maggie returned to work. The night dragged on forever and it seemed like people had no intention of ever leaving. Her feet were killing her and all she wanted to do was crawl into bed. She almost raised her arms in praise when the bartenders yelled for last call.

  Tables started to clear and Maggie cleaned and refilled napkins and salt as she made her way around the bar. If she stopped for too long, she might fall asleep. As she wiped a table clean, a conversation at the door caught her attention. She looked up.

  Eli was back. Jake, the doorman, was stopping him from coming in. From the corner of her eye, she saw Shane stiffen and take a step. She hurried to the door. “Jake, it’s okay. He’s a friend.”

  Jake glanced down at her. “We’re done serving.”

  Eli raised his arms. “I’m not looking to drink.”

  Maggie grabbed Eli’s hand and pulled him past Jake. “What are you doing here?”

  “I thought about calling you, but then I realized I’d rather see you. Do you have a few minutes?” He interlocked his fingers with hers. His hand wasn’t much bigger than hers.

  “Yeah.”

  “Can we go somewhere a little more private to talk?”

  “Sure.” She led the way toward the back. As she crossed into the back room, she almost crashed into Shane. When had he come back here? His eyebrows slammed together when he took in the scene, but he was on the phone, so he said nothing.

  Maggie continued to walk until she got to the back hallway. The space was dimly lit, and except for anyone going to or coming from the bathrooms, they would be alone.

  “Private enough?”

  “Yeah.”

  She leaned against the wall and tilted her face up to look at him. “Why’d you come back?”

  “I told you. I wanted to see you. And give you a good night kiss.” He leaned one arm against the wall by her head.

  Her heart thumped, but she couldn’t decipher whether it was a stab of panic at feeling trapped or good old-fashioned excitement. She took a deep breath. “You drove all the way back here for a kiss?”

  He dipped his head and smiled. “I thought it might be worth it.”

  He lowered his mouth to hers and their lips met. Although he started slow, Eli moved from easy to hard and fast in an instant. It wasn’t a bad kiss, but all her mind and mouth, for that matter, could focus on was how different this was compared to Shane’s kiss last weekend. Someone called Maggie’s name from the other side of the room.

  Eli pulled away. Maggie straightened. With her arm she pointed vaguely toward the bar. “I have to . . .”

  “Yeah. Good night, Maggie.”

  “’Night.” She moved back to the bar to finish closing. Eli walked past her and out the front door. She looked around to find Shane, but he wasn’t around. She tapped Kelly on the shoulder. “Have you seen Shane?”

  “Uh, yeah. He said he had to take a phone call, and since he was done for the night he went upstairs to talk.”

  “Oh.” Well, at least if he was already upstairs, he couldn’t corner her into having a conversation. Her kiss with Eli just muddled things even more. She liked Eli. She wanted to give him a shot, which meant she needed to get Shane out of her mind.

  CHAPTER 15

  Shane paced in his empty living room talking with Jimmy O’Malley. He’d already laid out what had happened during his home visit with Carroll and the interviews Carroll had done with Maggie and Jenna.

  Jimmy sighed. It was late and the man was probably exhausted, but Moira had made him return Shane’s call tonight. Those O’Learys were a pushy bunch.

  “I don’t know Carroll, but I do know a lie is more than just a red flag during the hiring process.”

  “But I didn’t lie.”

  “Doesn’t matter. It comes across that way. Your best bet is to call Carroll first thing tomorrow and explain.”

  “Do I tell him about Maggie?”

  “Crap. That’s a catch-22. From the outside, it sounds like you’re a stalker. But I don’t know if that’s better than being a liar when it comes to being at the bar.”

  “Is this going to bump me off the list?”

  “I have no idea. I’ve heard of guys doing a lot of stupid shit during the last couple of steps and it ruins their chances. If you’re honest, especially before the final interview, I think you’ll score some points.”

  “Okay. Thanks.”

  “He was serious about moving, though. You can’t play around with that and you can’t lie. They’re going to want proof that you’ve moved.”

  What he wouldn’t give for a couch to sit on right now. Or a table to kick. “Yeah, Carroll made that point. Thanks for all your help. You didn’t need to call me this late. It would’ve kept.”

  “No problem. Moira’s persistent.”

  Shane still wasn’t sure how Moira had gotten involved, but he was glad she had. Shane disconnected and took a shower. No matter how hot he made the water, his muscles wouldn’t loosen. Between the mess with the CPD and seeing Maggie drag some guy she barely knew through the bar, he was a mess.

  He needed to talk to Maggie. No matter what, he had to move. Maybe he could talk her into moving as well. If they gave their relationship a shot, they could live together. That would solve at least half his problems.

  As he dried off, he reminded himself he was moving too fast. He hadn’t even talked to Maggie about them. And she’d insisted on dating this other guy. What did that say about her feelings for Shane? He pulled on a pair of sweatpants and checked the time. Maggie should be done cleaning up by now.

  He walked to her apartment and knocked. She didn’t answer. He supposed it was possible that she came up and fell asleep already; she’d looked exhausted tonight.

  Or maybe she went home with the other guy, a small voice poked at him.

  No. He shoved that thought away. Maggie wouldn’t. She had more sense. He went back to his apartment and lay down on his bed. Maybe they were running late downstairs and she’d come knocking in a few minutes.

  Maggie finished working, said good-bye to her coworkers, and then crept up the stairs as quietly as humanly possible. She didn’t have it in her to talk to Shane tonight. Tomorrow night would start the holiday revelry, and she needed to have her shit together. Unfortunately, by the time she got to bed, sleep eluded her.

  She kept thinking about Eli. They’d had a lot of fun over the last few days. They shared a spark. Then she thought about the kiss. Did she really feel a spark, or was she convincing herself she had?

  Her phone buzzed on her nightstand. She cringed, afraid it was Shane, but the screen lit with Eli’s name. A short text: Still awake?

  Unfortunately. Hard to get settled after a long night.

  You just need to relax.

  She laughed. As if she had any shot of that happening.

  I could help both of us fall asleep. What are you wearing?

  The simple conversation had taken a turn. An orgasm would defini
tely help her sleep. If Eli could bring her there? Even better. Her hand glided along the flannel sleep shirt she wore. Not very sexy.

  Nothing.

  Good. That makes things easier. Imagine me lying next to you. I kiss your lips and work my way down. I lick your neck and feel your pulse pick up. I pinch your nipple, just enough to get you to moan.

  Maggie moved her hand to her nipple and tugged.

  You with me?

  Yeah.

  I kiss my way down your body, running my tongue over ever inch. Then I’d stroke your pussy. Is it wet?

  Yeah.

  I bet it tastes good.

  Maggie rubbed her clit in slow circles, but slow didn’t last long. She dropped her phone and closed her eyes. As soon as her lids shut, all she saw was Shane’s head between her legs. She remembered the look in his eyes as he went down on her.

  Her eyes flew open. No. This was supposed to be her and Eli. Her phone buzzed.

  You’re not into this, are you?

  The guilt sat on her chest. She didn’t want to hurt his feelings, or worse ding his ego. It wasn’t his fault. I’m trying, but it’s not working. Maybe I’m more tired than I thought.

  Then I guess we’ll have to try in person.

  Maybe. We’ll see.

  I’ll call tomorrow.

  I’m working late again—all weekend.

  Okay. Good night.

  Good night.

  She lay staring at her ceiling trying to sort things out. For a while, she’d been imagining some big guy in her fantasies. It only made sense that now that she was back home and seeing Shane almost daily, he would take over the mental image. Especially after last weekend.